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4 responses to “Share your “Mim”ories”
As you gradually left us, we strove to appreciate and cherish what you retained, rather than regret all you had lost.
My family always saw Mama (Mim) and Papa (Joe) as sources of endless wisdom. At some point in my teenage years my mother asked Mama for relationship advice for us young’uns.
Mama advised, “Select, don’t settle.” Find the right partner; don’t compromise on someone who isn’t a good fit. Little did I now that that advice would ring in my ears years later when I was “settling” in a relationship that wasn’t meant to be. After the relationship ended, I told Mama how instrumental her advice had been to me in making the decision to end the relationship. Her response? “That was actually from an ad.”* I remember being stupefied that I based a major life decision on a seemingly trite slogan!
On further reflection, I love this memory because it highlights for me that wisdom and knowledge isn’t cloistered away in learned heads or hidden meanings, but it’s in plain sight when you look for it. Connecting seemingly incongruous things often leads to breakthroughs. Like using an old ad for relationship advice.
*I seem to recall her saying it was for a brand of detergent or soap, but I may be misremembering. Google gives results for Barney’s Department store.
-David Sobey
Two hygiene-related memories of Grandma Mim (more to follow):
1) As an 11 year old, I had trouble grasping the concept of body odor. Grandma gave an attempt, very matter-of-fact, to help me come to an understanding. I appreciate her efforts now.
2) Years later, Grandma had remarked on some fancy towels she had experienced in a hotel. The washcloths had their corners snipped off. “They look very nice,” she said, “but they make it hard to wash your back. I don’t know how you wash your back, but I like hold the washcloth by the corners and scrub longways.”
I’m John, Grandma Mim’s grandson, and son of Kip.
When I think about Grandma, one memory that comes to mind for me is speaking Spanish. When I was in high school and she knew I was studying Spanish, she’d just come right over and start asking me questions in Spanish. No easing into it! At the time, I thought “oh this is kind of neat, having something in common with my Grandma”.
But I don’t think I fully appreciated then how impressive this was. While most of us only remember the language we learn as kids (or maybe a few select words from high school), Grandma didn’t get her Spanish major until her late forties. She kept it up for decades after that by jumping on each opportunity to use it. In her book, she wrote:
“Going to college changed my feelings about myself. With my own degree behind me, I felt a little more on a par with better-educated friends. I had gone to college too!
Majoring in Spanish and journalism was also significant. The language opened up a new world of travel, and journalism opened the door to job and volunteer opportunities—and self confidence—that I might have missed otherwise.”
As we heard, she also learned how to publish at home, volunteered with many different organizations, and even learned to be a leader – as president of the league of women voters, as well as a city councilwoman.
Sometimes the most powerful lessons our elders teach us are not ones they teach us explicitly, but rather through example. What Grandma taught us – and what lives on in the example her children set – was to never stop growing, reaching, learning, and to not let ourselves be limited by expectations.
As Lexie read, she finished her book with
“I, like Betty Friedan, can move into the unknown future with comfort, instead of being stuck in the past. . . Let’s see, what shall I do next?”
Grandma, I don’t know what’s next, whether you’ll be prez of heaven beautification committee? Spirit to Ecuador? Or just taking some well-earned rest. But thank you for the lessons you’ve taught us, the legacy you’ve left, and good luck with whatever challenge you decide to take on next.